The body language mistakes that are ruining your career

The body language mistakes that are ruining your career

Climbing the career ladder can be tough enough, but according to one Australian expert you can boost your chances of success simply by adjusting your body language.

Dr Diederik Gelderman, a certified trainer and founder of Body Language Australia, said everyone is born with 'super powers' which can increase their influence and even double their business success. 

'Most people don't realise how important body language and non-verbal communication is in their daily lives,' Dr Gelderman said.

According to Australian body language expert Dr Diederik Gelderman you can boost your chances of success simply by adjusting your body language. One of the main mistakes people make is using a fake smile (stock image pictured)

'You can change your life by learning to harness your body language and that of others, and use it to your advantage.

'Non-verbal communication is a science-based way for influencing people, winning friends, making better relationships, managing your team more effectively and easily, and even making more sales.'

According to Dr Gelderman, between 60 and 93 per cent of our communication is through body language, and in just 30 minutes, people can send over 800 non-verbal signals.

'By learning body language, you tell your brain to actively what to look for and you'll be amazed at how much you c an suddenly see. It's almost like seeing the world in high definition,' he said. 

'Learning body language will help you form deeper and better connections, but if you're in business â€" any business â€" it might also double your business.'

So what are the secrets to boosting your body-language signals? 

Not having both hands visible when meeting someone (stock image pictured) is a big mistake, according to the expert who said hands are 'trust indicators'

'Most people have heard how knowing, understanding and using positive body language can help you communicate better, get your message across more effectively as well as making you more credible, likable and trustworthy,' Dr Gelderman, who runs workshops to help people harness the power of body language, told Daily Mail Australia.

'However very few of us know or understand the effects of 'bad' or negative body language â€" these are just as important.'

Here are the mistakes you are making and how to fix them: 

Mistake 1: Not having both hands visible when meeting someone

'Hands are 'trust indicators',' Dr Gelderman said.  'They are the first thing we notice about someone when we meet them.

'This goes back to our caveman days when we wanted to know; friend or foe. So, make sure that you keep your hands visible when you meet someone.'

Mistake 2: Not shaking hands

Touching someone triggers the release of oxytocin, the 'hormone of connection'. 

'A 'hit' of oxytocin (which is what happens when you shake hands), is equivalent to three hours of one-on-one conversation,' the expert explained.

'If you want to build connection and trust fast, then shake that person's hand.'

As well as using a fake smile, another mistake is using 'low power' body language which means people are less likely to trust and respect you. The expert said scrolling through a mobile phone (stock image pictured) automatically puts you in a 'low power pose'

Mistake 3: Not having a genuine smile when meeting

'A smile is the only facial micro-expression - there are seven -  which can be detected at 300 yards,' Dr Gelderman explained.

'Again, like the visible hands, a smile engenders trust and likeability â€" this also goes back to our caveman roots.

'A fake smile - where the cheeks are not raised, nor are the wrinkles around the eyes present - can be easily differentiated by most people you meet,' he added.

'Ensure th at when you meet people, you show a genuine smile.'

Mistake 4: You are using 'low power' body language

High power body language occurs when you take up space; your chest is out, shoulders are back and you stand tall and confident â€" this instantly makes you more credible, gives you more charisma and gets people to like, trust and respect you more.

'Low power body language is the opposite and occurs when you make yourself 'smaller', when you occupy less space and in this situation, people are less likely to find you credible and less likely to trust and respect you,' Dr Gelderman said.

'Checking your mobile phone typically puts you into a low body power situation. This will most definitely impact the outcome of your meeting. So, leave your phone in the car.'

When we are nervous we typically make 'self-soothing' gestures like putting our hands to our head (stock image pictured) or wringing our hands. Dr Gelderman said this moves make you look like you are less in control

Mistake 5: Not demonstrating that you 'respect' the person you are talking to

'When your top, torso and toes all face at the person you are talking to, it tells them, unconsciously, that you respect them and that you are paying attention to them. This is called 'fronting',' Dr Gelderman said.

He added that fronting can be done both when standing or sitting.

'When any one of your top, torso or toes is not pointing at the other person, at some level they will notice, and they'll feel that you are not quite on the same wavelength,' he said.

'This will detract from the outcome of that meeting or that conversation. Make sure you front at all times.'

Mistake 5: Not doing the 'listening' pose

HOW TO HIGHLIGHT A POINT USING BODY LANGUAGE

If you want to highlight an important point when you are talking to one person or to a group, then just lean in towards them slightly at that particular point, Dr Gelderman advised.

'If you really want to emphasise or even 'underline' that point, then slightly raise one eyebrow concurrently with your leaning,' he said.

'Your listener will then know exactly how important what you are saying is,' he said.

According to the expert, if you want to 'tell' someone that you're interested in them and what they're saying, but, you don't want to interrupt them, then lean your upper body slightly in towards them when they say something or make a point that really rings true for you. 

Mistake 6: Showing your nerves 

When we are nervous we typically make 'self-soothing' gestures. 

This is where we might straighten our tie, play with our hair, twiddle an ear-ring or even rub an arm or a leg or wring our hands together.

'When we do any of these, the other party will see us as a less in control, more insecure, less reliable a nd even less honest than if we didn't make these gestures,' Dr Gelderman explained.

'Be on the lookout for your own nervous mannerisms and eliminate them to appear more confident and reliable.'

 

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